HOW TO WIN AT YOUR 9 TO 6 DESK JOB

                         

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Through millenniums of evolution and constant changing of the whole universe, we the sole owners of this universe were finally managing to reach the karmic conclusions and were able to understand that the purpose of life is getting an education as per scholastic standards and definition of education, choosing a field of higher probability of employment, getting employed and follow it 0900 hours to 1800 hours of everyday, five days of every week (six in some cases) and month after month after month, till the cycle becomes year after year after year until one retires at the age of sixty and then can relax and reminisce and yes take up gardening or baby sit the grandchildren. Life was set, pattern was formed, and norms were obvious, until the boom of internet in the past decade or so and those people who were earlier corrupting the minds of young and static with their art and cinema, literature, romanticism, Sufism, exploration and all such scams now became more visible and highly vocal, confusing the young and bright future of society, nation and mankind in general.

But we, those who know our purpose for life and are dedicated towards it, need to be focused and also help our brothers who get dazed and confused by these flashy ideas.

So here are the seven points that will help you to stay focused and succeed at your office that is your life.

STOP READING ANYTHING THAT MIGHT MAKE YOU THINK    

      

                      

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First of all, don’t misread this point, it doesn't say abandon reading, you don’t want to appear uncultured, do you? But it should have nothing to do with philosophy of any sort. The word philosophy translates into ‘love for knowledge’. Seriously? Aren't there enough things to love already? Apart from your family and friends, there’s your personal stuff, your hard-earned, image enhancing, self esteem boosting stuff i.e. your vehicle, your watches, your phone, your clothes. In short everything that makes you the person you are, then why the hell you need philosophical contemplation for? Ignore that stuff en masse and you will be good to go.

FOCUS MORE AND MORE ON PAY DAY 

           

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“20 more to go... now 15, now 13”every other day, keep up with this count down on the best day of the month, the one day because of which all the other 29 seem relevant. This is seriously an elating feeling; to pass by for entire month for that one day, when you find the real happiness, your phone blinks and the message reads salary credited and then.... you pay bills, it really is exciting.

BREAK THE MONOTONY 

                        

                  

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Don’t get me wrong, I am not talking about the monotony of life. What is life without monotony? That “adventure” stuff, leave that for roadies aspirants! Real people with real jobs and a real life don’t go after these stupid pursuits; I am talking about breaking the monotony of the office. Change your gossip groups periodically but carefully, never lose your cover.  Postpone your Tea and sutta breaks, say by half hour and sometime even an hour and that extended period can bring in such excitement, once in a while you can slip out for a loo break and catch a quick nap of fifteen minutes right on that WC, after all everybody needs thrill in life. 

EXTENDED WEEKEND TRIPS

                        

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Blessed are those who have a five day working week and once in a while nature plays such sweet tricks and you end up having a three or a four day long weekend. And the true appreciators of mother nature call their buddies, take out there shorts, pack their bag packs, charge their power banks, get a nice hairdo, shop for holiday clothes, change guitar strings, grab a DSLR or download beauty app on their smart phone, get 3G recharge and just surrender to the mother nature and become one with it. Those who work so hard the whole month deserve these breaks, away from the so called “civil society” and the constant need and games of societal approval, competition and appreciation.

CREAVITY- THE OVERRATED PHENOMENON

                     

           

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Creativity is a false pretext and just doesn't exist the way it is propagated in this mean, dog eat dog world of today. It is a pursuit of unhappy, restless, unethical people who are jealous of those who find happiness in their life and want to disturb their peaceful minds by inducing the ideas like what they are doing is not enough and there should be something more. In my opinion God is the creator of heaven and earth and everything in between, can we ever top that? The answer is big NO!  Creativity is a game of celestial beings and not of us mere mortals, we exist and one day we stop existing if we accept this, we will lead a happier life, but those influenced by ungodly thoughts (read satanic) will always play with your mind but you should be in control of your senses. Nothing is original anyway, so there hardly is anything creative in our species.

THE PERKS OF BEING AN OFFICE MANAGER

                     

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You hate your manager? Well keep on hating him/her, because there is someone is who doesn’t hate him/her rather gets inspired and take notes and befriends the manager and offers to overstay at the office and tells the boss that there is no I in the team and let me tell you one thing, in a couple of years that team member of yours will become the next manager and you will be hating him and yourself then. Shun that big ego of yours and start to be like your manager because that guy my friend is a winner, in your office. Let me tell you a story, once there was an aspiring tabla player who when couldn't become student of his favourite tabla maestro, took up job as his dish washer because the maestro’s practice room was right next to the kitchen, so he washed the dishes for some ten years and became a master by listening the master practice. Well that’s some old school stuff, you don’t have to go through this ordeal, share a few cigarettes, spend on a few lunches, ram in those presentations, become an efficient team player, let the boss know who is the boss and surely one day you will be a winner, in your office.

THINK ABOUT THE RETIREMENT PLAN

                        

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A sunny February morning, bright sun complimenting the crisp weather like hot tea compliments the crisp biscuit, a lush green lawn with colourful flowers which are at their prime youth in this spring season, in front of a modest yet sweet home and a person, in his grey years, sitting on a rocking chair sipping aromatic coffee after a slightly tedious task of watering the flowers, that person has no  major responsibility now, kids are on their own, he has a nice, thick fixed deposit of the provident fund he got on retirement, no big rush, blood pressure might be fluctuating but over all like everything else in life is average, not so good, but at least not at all bad. Such a serene picture it is, right? This could be you, if you manage to work consistently, without any major setback, without much risk, without making any enemy, without doing any huge, out of the league stupidity for thirty years, then you can have a dream retirement. That surely would be a relief. Happiness? Sure! The feeling of relief is kind of a happy feeling right? Believe me it is as good as it gets and if you are able to make it through, you would be proud of yourself, at least you wouldn't be ashamed right?