Sunday, 6 May 2018

DIARY OF A STRANGE MAN : THE PURPOSE


THE PURPOSE

The bouts of tiredness, insomnia, and headaches were now constant. He was now accustomed to feeling disgruntled all the time. He wanted to do things but couldn’t see the point of doing anything. It was a great loss, the loss of appetite for the sense of achievement.
A thought would come to his mind, “what if this keeps going on like this for the whole life; if every day will be carried out with the same helpless manner of unhappy resentment?  Or will that be just an idea of a life, constant tedium of wasting time deliberately just to think “What the day was all about?” at the end of it. This thought made him see one thing clearly. He could now empathize with the origin and idea of GOD. It is the dissatisfaction of the slow descent towards nothingness that urges humans to seek a purpose and yet when the grips of the limited conscience don’t allow the thoughts to flow fearlessly, comes alive the promise of eternity.
Thus the rituals and manifestations of the cults and paths to achieve God generate purpose. No purpose can ever surpass the enigma of the purpose that is unachievable in the physical world.
Every day then becomes a devotion to rise above the average miserable person who is meandering aimlessly through the woods thinking it is home. But the person of God thinks he has found the shepherd and they will know the home once they reach there and they will only reach there when they will complete the journey and this journey will be completed when the distances assigned for each day are covered. They never see that they are covering the same mile every day, walking in circles, never going anywhere. The promised destination is unknown and its ambiguity is its locus of attraction.  
Whether you are lost without knowing it or you are lost and helpless about it, you are just, lost.
Pondering on these thoughts he presumed that just like the person with the tedium of rituals if he too can conjure his own purpose, he might start to fill the emptiness. He too can pretend to be in the right direction and stride towards it with zeal and determination.
Still, he would be lost, no matter what he presumes and pretends. If the purpose is not quantifiable then there is no purpose at all and no quantifiable purpose could be eternal, which nullifies the very idea for the quest of a purpose. This thought shadowed him and another day passed.

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